here kitty, kitty....

wil and lucy don't have the only starring roles in our house. they share the billing with our two cats, stone peoria & murphy. each time we add a new member to our cast the star of the show has become a supportive player. however, when you think about theatre & movies, it's the supporting roles who give the whole production color. with that in mind, today we turn the spotlight on stone & murph.

i got stone in the summer of 1996. i really wanted a cat of my own so i headed to the local shelter in sherman, texas. as always, there were so many cute cats waiting for a home but stone was a special case. she and 13 of her brothers and sisters had been found in a dumpster with their mother who was deceased. the kittens were sharing two cages and i sat on the floor and took each one out one by one. all were bouncy and playful...except stone. she was the runt of that huge litter and when i took her out she stayed right were i'd placed her. that did it for me. i paid my $20 and took her home. she was so tiny and scared. erin was my roommate at the time and in her room at the back of the house she had a bookshelf made of wood and cinderblock, very common college student furniture.stone used to go into her room and crawl into a hole on the side of the cinderblock and stay for hours and hours. she was gray and blended into the block hence her name. (i also had a fascination with stone phillips & stone gossard of pearl jam so it worked. oh, and i thought she was a boy.) she got very sick soon after coming home with ring worm. she lost all her hair after she was treated by a quack vet and almost died. she wasn't even a month old! as soon as she began to get better i started buying her canned tuna and salmon. she ate it up....and she started putting on weight...and never stopped. she has been with me for almost 13 years and i could fill a book with stories about her. she is moody and smart, loving and funny. she was my first "kid"and she has a special place in my heart. i am delighted that wil loves her above all our animals and find it endearing that she is never far from where he is. she has a crazy name (another story for another day), a full-figured bod and a tiny head. she is one of a kind and my life wouldn't be the same without her.

murphy came along in the summer of 2002. we'd discussed getting another cat as a friend for stone and murph kind of fell into our lap. i worked with a woman whose neighbor had a pregnant cat dropped in her lap. the pregnant cat, emily, was a 6-toed cat also called a double paw. (if you've never seen a double paw cat they are really cute. their hands & feet look like catcher's mitts.) my co-worker told me this story one day and i asked her to secure one of the kittens for us. we went to see them right after they were born (remember rita?!?!!?) and couldn't wait to go back and pick one out. ryan and i went one saturday, played with them all and picked murphy. ironically murphy was the only kitten that wasn't born with double paws. the woman we got him from questioned us about our decision (as if we were biased!!!) but murph was the most frisky of all the kittens and that's what we wanted. we had one laaaaaaaazy cat, we didn't want another! besides, we thought a frisky kitten might give stone a much needed workout. murphy was so cute and funny. he bounced all over our tiny apartment and gave us a ton of laughs. he still does. stone hated him (and us) in the beginning but she soon got over that. they are as close as brother and sister. murphy is a comedian. he is mysterious and longs to run away outside and sometimes does. he has become extremely loving lately and is the one animal that tolerates wil's "petting." he drinks a ton of water (we had to buy him a water fountain - seriously) and will steal a twizzler right from your hand. another one of a kind and we are grateful to share our days with him.
i know a lot of people don't care for cats but i find them fascinating. they are super smart and can be grumpy and opinionated but when they love you they really love you and it's great. stone and murphy...you're the cat's meow.

BFFs

when i was growing up my BFF was a little doll my grandmother nora gave me. her name was karen and i carried her everywhere by her hair. i guess i thought that was the best way to hold her. she's still with me and is as beautiful as ever*.

wil's BFF is a giraffe blankie who ryan and i named paco way back when to avoid saying, "where's his giraffe? which one? that one? no this one..." wil is in love with paco and although he doesn't yet realize it, paco is special because he was a gift from my BFF denise. each time i go in to get wil out of bed he raises paco to me first for a greeting. each night before ryan puts wil to bed, paco is pushed into my face for his own goodnight kiss. paco's mere presence makes wil feel safe, secure and happy. i have long stated that i would not give into the idea that there should be a backup paco. i used to believe that losing paco would be a good lesson in loss but that was long before an adorable little boy fell in love with him. with that in mind...i'll be shopping for paco #2...just in case.

*beauty is clearly in the eye of the beholder. when i took karen out for her photo session i showed her to wil. he backed away from her. i pushed him toward her, he turned a moved further way. the look on his face was one of utter horror and he made an "ick" sound. ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! maybe loss isn't a lesson i am prepared to teach him but acceptance of things that look different absolutely is. poor karen. she's gorgeous! missing thumb, wobbly neck, dirty face & all.

city gym, country gym

i am from lamesa. suffice to say, i am not fancy, i know basic and, honestly, i prefer things that way. but a little fancy never hurt anyone.....right?

for the past month ryan's dad and step-mother (heretofore ned & katie) have been talking to me about passing over ned's membership to the atlantic club. each time this conversation has come up i have been quick to tell them that i recently joined WOW and that i am happy with the gym and it's services. that always falls on deaf ears. they have talked up the pool, the babysitting, the machines and the classes at the atlantic club and i have polietly listened always saying, "yes, it sounds great - but i am a member of WOW and i like it there." either they haven't heard me or they don't care because, well, you'll see.

this all started when ned decided to join a gym. naturally he joined the atlantic club. he stopped by for a visit and a glass of water after one of his first workouts and i congratulated him on trying on a new, healthy, lifestyle for size. a few days after that he failed a stress test given by the club and was told he'd need a note from the doctor to continue. until he was able to produce said note, the membership would be on hold. he made an appointment that he moved and then moved again. as it turns out he wasn't all that interested in the new lifestyle and since he'd paid for a year's membership up front he decided to pass it off to me. thus, paragraph #1.

ryan and i get a kick out of both ned and katie. they are absolutely generous to a fault - especially to me - and whatever they decide you need, you get - the deluxe model. i explained again and again to ryan that i felt bad taking the membership when i already went to WOW. he finally said, "take it. they won't stop until you do and, who knows, maybe you'll like it better. or maybe you'll find a combination of both gyms best fits your needs." ryan. so, so rational and fair. so, i accepted and am now a keycard carrying member of both the atlantic club and WOW.

i decided that today was a good day to try the atlantic club out for the first time. they have an intensive yoga class schedule and i wanted to see if the classes were really as top notch as they're rumored to be. because the class was 90 minutes and i wanted to get the lay of the land i asked katie to watch wil for me. she happily agreed, arrived promptly at 10a and off i went.

my first chuckle came only seconds after i turned into the parking lot. you see, standing out front were two guys in inform ready and waiting to valet park your car...complimentary. wow. or more to the point...not that WOW. i happily parked myself. i walked into the club through the automatic doors and had my second giggle as i passed the coffee bar/cafe - it was packed. the woman that greeted me was SO nice and offered to show me around. i was in a rush to get to class so i said i'd give myself a tour after. the facility is gorgeous. there is, indeed, a huge pool, wonderful machines, a pilates room full of strange apparatuses, there is a large and lovely spa, a locker room that has a hot tub and wet and dry saunas and, of course, the daycare. the best part about the daycare is that i can leave wil there for $5 should i ever visit the spa. WOW. no, not that wow. impressive.

the class was amazing. the woman that taught it was from india and, honestly, i think that made it even better. she had the heat up high, kept the room dark and said things like, "say an om into your third eye." SOLD.

the whole time i was there i felt like i was cheating on WOW. WOW is fancy, too, in its own way. the equipment is state of the art, the classes are good and i feel comfortable there. i felt comfortable at the atlantic club too. so, what's a girl to do? i've decided to keep both memberships going. if i find i go to one or the other more often i'll make a decision then. like i say, i am not about fancy as much as i am about results; and you can get results in a barn, in the dead of winter, in the middle of nowhere. rocky taught us that.

craft works

i love art. i specifically love art done in the arts & crafts style and folk art. keeping that in mind there are a lot of things i wish i could do. in some respects i am a bit more a dreamer than a doer. i don't think that my resistance to do comes from laziness but more from the fear of failing coupled with a lack of patience and the unrealistic idea that i should be able to do everything perfect on the first try. for example...i had always wanted to go to 'paint your pottery' and paint something. rita, always a friend in trying out new artsy ventures, agreed to go with me one saturday when i lived in boston. she picked out a teapot, i picked out a wine chiller. she had fun painting hers, i did not. she did not try to be perfect and therefore enjoyed herself, i did not. she loved her teapot, i hated my wine chiller.

i happened along a little table stuck in the corner last night before leaving vendor's night. i hadn't seen much that tickled my fancy at that point and had only made one purchase - a pair of fun earrings for myself. the table was covered in the cutest t-shirts of kids i have ever seen. they were made by a woman in balitmore and were being sold by her friend in NJ. awe and envy is how i felt browsing these shirts. it was one of those 'why didn't i think of this!?!?!' moments. i couldn't resist...i bought 3 for wil.

the woman sells her shirts on etsy.com which is one of my favorite websites. in browsing the site this morning i remembered exactly how much i love handmade stuff. i feel inspired - to do what i don't know - but i'll keep you posted. in the meantime, if you are looking for a gift, something fun for yourself or a little inspiration, check out etsy. i promise you won't be disappointed.

make new friends...keep the old

rita came to visit us for a few days this past sunday. if you don't know rita you are really missing out on a neat person. the youngest of seven children rita is about as laid back as they come. we met soon after i moved to boston when we worked together at the archdiocese of boston. we became fast friends and have remained so over the past 7 years. i was so grateful that she made the trip to NJ...five hours in a car alone is not always easy...but thankfully she had beautiful driving weather both ways. it was a thrill to be able to show off wil - especially to such an attentive audience. we spent her time here cooking, walking, shopping, eating, driving and, most importantly, talking. rita is both a great conversationalist and a great listener. we have shared a lot of thoughts on many subjects over the years and it was fun to have nothing but 3 days to talk and think with her. i am so glad you came, rita. i cannot wait for the next visit!

after last week's post detailing the events of my failed playdate i have happy news to report. this week at music class a new woman joined our group. she and i seemed to hit it off and at the end of class she suggested we exchange numbers which we did. i don't know where that will lead, if anywhere, but it was nice to be singled out for a number exchange. i also made some headway with a woman in my class that i like and have been casually and slowly cozying up to for a few weeks. her daughter is almost exactly the same age as wil and she and her husband are about to move into a house in one of the towns that make up the newcomer's club. i actually know someone that lives near her new place and asked her if she planned to join newcomer's. she said she probably would after the first of the year and suggested that wil and i come over after they actually moved in and were settled. that also felt good and i walked out of music with a little more spring in my step.

also of interest...the failed playgroup seems unwilling to die. a woman from the original group offered to host this week. i emailed her to say that wil and i would be there. it was this morning and before we arrived i stopped to buy her some sunflowers, my favorite, as a thank you for having us. we were the only people to show (she was expecting 3 total) and i was glad we did. her son is 10 months old and he and wil played well together. we had quite a few things in common: both lived in boston, both dated our husbands long distance, both red sox fans, both husbands are penn state fans, both tall. i admitted to her that i wasn't sure i saw our assigned playgroup getting off the group but suggested that she and i do something together with the boys soon. she seemed happy with that suggestion and i will make good on it.

i am also stepping a little further out there by attending the newcomer's club vendor night tonight. vendor night is held this month in place of the monthly sip & chat and there might be some cool arty-crafty stuff to buy. it will be the second newcomer's event i've attended this season and will complete #34 on my list.

and one last thing combining both playgroups and newcomer's club....heather's playgroup is being held tomorrow and i have been invited. the interesting part is that it is not at heather's and one of the women took it upon herself to include me. even though my link to the group is unable to go wil and i are still going and that is a good thing.

all in all things are good. i went from taking pictures of an empty room to this in just under a month. patience truly is a virtue.

winning endorsement

i made a list recently of the products i am currently loving. as luck would have it...i cannot find the list. anywho...maybe i still have enough brain cells left to recreate it. i'm giving it my best shot.

microplane zester/grater
if you don't have one of these puppies, run - don't walk - to get one. jessica had an extra somehow and i was the lucky recipient of said extra. i am in LOVE with the thing. it is easy to use and grates everything from hard cheese to soft cheese to lemon to cinnamon. as you can see it only costs $9.99 but it works like it costs $999.99.

aqua globes
this "AMAZING, AS SEEN ON TV" product is another gem. oddly enough it's best saleswoman is a 4.5 year old girl named lily. lily saw the commerical one day and became an immediate true believer. she encouraged her mother, heather, to go out and buy them right away even though they don't have any houseplants. she's also encouraged me to get them and given me the entire sales pitch. well, way to go lily, because i bought it hook, line and sinker. when i moved the plants inside for winter my biggest dread was keeping them wet. well, well, well...no need to worry. the aqua globe does that for you. laugh if you will but they work and they are awesome. and, honestly, i think they are kind of cool looking. in fact, i like them so much that i bought 4 and plan to add at least 2 to that collection. a tip that the makers of aqua globe don't share. the plant you put the aqua globe in should have fairly damp soil when you insert the globe. otherwise the plant sucks all the water out of the globe in one day and you are back to watering all the time...or filling the globe all time. lesson learned the hard way. if you love your plants but hate watering them, aqua globes are for you.

clorox anywhere hardsurface
if you have 3 pets and a little boy this is a no brainer. if you live alone this is a no brainer. watered down bleach that won't hurt anyone but kills 99.9% of all bacteria...no brainer.

wholly guacamole 100 calorie snackpack
guacamole in a 100 calorie snackpack? nothing more to say... i know you're thinking that it probably isn't much guac but, surprisingly, it is enough for two sandwiches or a decent helping of chips. yummy and easy.

maidenform hip fit cotton boyshorts
my friend amy swears by these. she made me buy a pair while we were out shopping during her visit last january. i resisted but bought just one pair. she was right about everything - comfortable, no panty lines, all cotton for breathing, etc. i have since purchased 5 additional pair and look forward to slowly converting all my underwear to these. woo hoo amy! (they are $9/pair in department stores...you can find them on the net at places like barenecessities.com (my fave) for much less.)

so there you have it. if you find yourself with time to grate some fresh lime zest into your guacmole while wearing your boyshorts... time you only have because the house is 99.9% bacteria free and the plants are watered...think of me.

courting mommy

my dear friend rita sent me an article on mommy dating this week with the question, "is it really like this?" SIGH. yes, rita, it's really like this. allow me to illustrate my point.

i am a member of a social organization called newcomer's club that brings people from four towns together for women's events, men's events, couples's events, family events, charity events...you get the idea. we joined last year but after having wil i was not emotionally ready to tackle meeting new people. this year i have been to one of the women's events and i requested that wil and i be added to a playgroup. i was excited about the playgroup for several reasons but mainly because two dear friends (denise & heather) have uber-successful playgroups where moms AND kids have become great friends. i wanted that for myself...and for wil.

assignments came out about 6 weeks ago and i was placed in a group with seven other women with children all around wil's age. i was so excited but as not to seem desperate i waited to see if anyone else would jump before i plunged. no one did (which should've been a sign) so i offered to host the first group at my house. after about 1,000 emails back and forth we all agreed that thursday's from 9:30-11:00 worked for all of us. i was excited. all seven women were coming and i just knew lifelong friends for both wil and me were going to show up on my door step.

the night before four of the seven cancelled. still hopefull i got up before 6a on the morning of the big day and scrubbed the area that we'd be "playing" in within an inch of it's life. i was working on adrenalin and hope. i took a shower, took great care with my hair and got dressed up...but not too up...again, didn't want to seem desperate. i got wil dressed up too and by 8:45 we were ready and waiting. and waiting. and waiting so long, in fact, that wil gave up.

you can probably see where this is headed. my first guest arrived at 10:15. she was very nice but, honestly, i cannot remember her name. she did not want coffee or water or coffee cake. she hovered over her daughter and kept pulling out toys that she brought from home for her daughter to play with. i am sure she is a lovely, wonderful person but for lack of a better way to say it...she wasn't my type. my second guest arrived frazzled and apologetic at 10:50. she also didn't want coffee (or water...or coffee cake) and her child, the oldest of the group, ran all over the house without her supervision. at one point, she actually said, "i wonder where he is..." WHA? in her defense, she was pregnant and the kid was BEYOND high energy but, jeez, wow. again, she is probably a wonderful, lovely, person but, while more my type, i just wasn't feeling it. the third person never showed up and the aforementioned left at 11:05.

disappointed does not begin to describe how i felt. i was completely deflated. look, it's not that i don't have friends here. i do, great ones. this is not about wanting to replace those friends...just add to them. and, honestly, this was a chance for me to make friends on my own. it was the first time since having wil that i was willing to put myself out there and it flopped. luckily, i am not a quitter. i'm in this game to stay and, eventually, i know i'll find a winning team.

so, rita, the overwhelming answer to your question is YES. it's hard to meet moms, it's hard to meet men, it's hard to make friends sometimes, too. even if you have a great network naturally in place there will still be a time when you've gotta swim out there on your own and it's hard. the thing that keeps me going, however, is that with perseverance you will eventually make great, lifelong friends that will totally get it when you share stories just like this.

if you can stomach it...check out my photos.

my greenhouse

i am a big fan of the fern. since becoming a home owner in franklin it has been my "signature" to hang ferns on my front porch in the summer. i think they are beautiful and they require little maintenance. last spring ryan's dad, ned, called on his way to the local farmer's market and asked if we needed anything. ryan asked him to price ferns for me because i always try to get the biggest fern at the best price. i should've known, knowing ned, that he'd show up not only with ferns but two of the biggest ferns i have ever laid eyes on. he said they were a mother's day gift to me and i was touched. because they were my first mother's day gift and so incredibly beautiful i am making it my mission to keep them alive through the winter.

heather's mom, diane, is an avid gardener and knows quite a bit about plants. she has given me advice on everything from identifying weeds in my flower beds to growing an orchid (i killed it). while we were visiting the botanical gardens i sought her advice on keeping the ferns through the winter as well as bringing in several geraniums that were thriving on the patio. she suggested keeping all the plants together and creating a humid environment for them if possible. she explained to me how i might do that and i listened with interest. i just happen to have a large bay window in the back of the house that gets a lot of winter sun. it is in that window that i have created a makeshift greenhouse that i hope will allow my plants to survive the long winter. ryan even suggested using the electric heater below the window to occasionally create steam by using damp sponges. if it works it'll be INGENIOUS. regardless, i am proud of the way it turned out and, hopefully, i'll be reporting in the spring that everything survived.

thanks diane for the advice! wish me luck!

i want to ride my bicycle!

sunday we went to sandy hook to ride our bikes. when we got there it was colder than cold but we persevered and enjoyed an invigorating 45 minute ride. it is such a treat to live 5 minutes from the ocean. even if i spend the rest of my life in new jersey i don't think i will ever tire of going to the shore and watching the waves. there is something so peaceful about watching the water, listening to the hush of the waves and focusing your eyes on a horizon that never ends. it has been a huge bonus to our move and i hope to never take it for granted.

for more highlights of our ride, click here.

cows, pip, a milestone and a monkey...oh my!

but does anyone have time to actually post to it????

i know it seems like i've neglected my blog lately, and, i suppose as a point of fact, i have. but not on purpose. it's hard to write anything intelligent when a little boy starts to cry and pull at your leg every time you sit down at the computer. so, lately, my time has been limited to paying bills and checking email. thank goodness for the iPhone. it's allowed me to check email from the rocking chair in his room but blogging from a phone just isn't going to happen. i think about the blog all the time, take photos to go with the posts i write in my head and become a little blue when they never materialize. but all that has gotta change...starting now. thankfully wil loves books - even when i am not reading them to him - so i have him set up near by with a stack of books and he is "reading"...for now.*

two and a half weeks ago we made the journey to PA so that i could get my hair did. we decided ahead of time to stay for the weekend to watch the big ohio state/penn state football game. tia graciously made the trip to NJ on thursday to pick wil and i up so that we wouldn't have two cars in PA. we had lunch, shopped at wegmans and headed back to PA. i got my hair done on friday, we cooked the top secret chili for the party on saturday and enjoyed relaxing together. we had a wonderful "tailgate" party on saturday night and got to see so many good PA friends. penn state rolled over ohio state with ease (we are...penn state!) taking one more step in the quest for a national championship. (thank you texas tech for continuing to pave the highway toward miami!) sunday ryan spent the day four-wheeling with the guys and tia and i toured the PA countryside, had lunch at the blue bird inn and met some new friends along the way. it was the perfect way to spend a lazy sunday...driving, talking, eating and trying to pet a cow. (if you know me at all you know that this was THE highlight of my day. i really missed my calling to be a vet.) enjoy our photos from the weekend! (note: all photos of the crew watching the game in the basement were taken by ry. he was attempting to get some candid shots but they are all horrible - no one is looking at him and most people look annoyed although no one was! i kept them in for laughs.)

i love this picture of tia and wil. tia called wil "nixy" while we were there. nixy is a PA dutch term that means: mischievous, ornery, sly. i think she hit the nail on the head; however, i think she is the one who looks NIXY here.

when we got home from PA i learned that my mom, pip, was going to be in DC for a conference the following week. DC is a quick three hour drive from shrewsbury and it was a no-brainer that i make the trip to see her. i miss my mom and i wanted to see her. i know she wanted to see me, too, but let's be real...seeing wil was a HUGE bonus. we had a wonderful time visiting, shopping and watching wil do all his new tricks. we had dinner at clyde's in georgetown and ate some yummy cupcakes from hello cupcake for dessert. mom was at the conference with her co-worker (and friend!) kristi miller. if you don't know kristi she is a fun, easy-going, sweet woman with a huge heart. we so appreciate her letting us bring total chaos to the hotel room she shared with mom. i was delighted to get to know her better and was so glad she shared the time with us. i walked away noting how much she cares for my mother and that made me feel great. i think traveling to DC on the spur of the moment might've completed #3 on my list. no, it wasn't a vacation per se, but anyone that has a wiggly 11 month old boy knows that the extra set(s) of hands made it a vacation for me. thanks mom and kristi...it was absolutely worth the drive. i'd do it again tomorrow! we didn't get many good pictures in DC but i tried.

true love

the day we left for DC wil turned 11 months old. it's hard to believe that 11 months has passed. as tough as it is for me to accept, he is going to turn 1 and 2 and 20...someday. he is still the sweet boy he's been since the beginning although he is starting to show a real mischievous streak and, on occasion, has thrown a fit or two. yikes. luckily ryan and i are n*sync with how to handle him during these moments and we seem to get him through them quickly and no worse for wear. he is starting to be more selective about what he eats although the idea of portion control hasn't occurred to him. he still sucks down three 9 0z bottles per day and will, on most days, also eat three meals. he has a great sense of humor and loves to laugh. that is a beautiful thing and something we embrace. he hasn't taken his first steps yet but he seems like he wants to and we expect it any day. he loves music, has yet to grow tired of the animals (only more fond) and absolutely adores reading. he both "reads" to himself and brings me books to read to him. among those he never tires of hearing/looking at: knuffle bunny, my little animal book, doggies and where is baby's belly button? ryan faithfully reads if i built a car and i never tire of the pigeon books by mo willems. it fills me with pride that he's taken to books. if he didn't care for books i would've loved him anyway but it would've been a lot harder. (kidding. sort of. no really.) everyday brings more curly BLONDE hair, more teeth, more "words", more curiosity, more independence, more laughter and more love than i ever thought possible. he is our wonder and we are delighted by him. happy 11 months!

flying high: 11 months old

the day we headed back from DC was halloween. we decided wil should be a monkey this year before the days of dressing up as something cute pass us by for the days of dressing up as something cool. man oh man...was he cute?!?! even if i do say so myself he was adorable in that monkey suit. he didn't trick o' treat (save for his visit to miss heather's house - thanks for the pumpkin book, heath!) but he sat on the porch with us and handed out candy to all the kiddos that came by. initially annoyed with the costume he seemed to embrace it in the end and, as a treat, we let him have one twizzler which he gobbled up with glee. it was a great way to spend the spookiest of the holidays and we can't wait to trot him around next year.

monkey business

needless to say, it's a busy life. in so many ways i am happier than i have ever been before. i know i have a good life (charlotte!) and i am so grateful for all the gifts i have been given. with any luckwil will give me the gift of 30 minutes a day to add to this blog. if he'll grant me that (and if i can lose 10 lbs.) i'll be complete.

*i was stopped 4 times during the writing of this post and it took 7 hours to write. now THAT is dedication.

pumpkin pickin'

sunday we took a trip to the dearborn farms pumpkin patch. the patch was S-A-D-L-Y picked over but we didn't mind. we made our way through the corn maze, "rooted" for the pink cuties in the pig races and watched all the walking kiddos run around like crazy. it was the perfect way to spend a beautiful fall day with my guys. enjoy the photos!

flowers & friends in bloom

last friday wil and i were invited to take a day trip to the new york botanical garden with heather, lily and heather's parents, rob & diane. it was members day (thanks rob & diane!) and the opening of the 2008 kiku exhibit. kiku is the japanese art of chyrsanthemum cultivation. it was fantastic! i have never seen anything like this and cannot believe the time and care and PATIENCE that obviously goes into creating these beautiful flowers. if i wouldn't have been arrested i would picked the flower below - i thought it was the most beautiful and unusual thing!

the gardens were beautiful, the exhibit was amazing and it was a trip i would love to make again. we spent a wonderful day outside in perfect fall weather enjoying nature, lunch and friends. thank you heather for inviting us and thank you rob & diane for sharing your membership with us. we had a wonderful time!

surprise, surprise, surprise

there is nothing better than an unexpected gift to boost your spirits and last friday* i was the lucky recipient of one such gift.

ryan and i had a pretty lame friday night planned. we were watching wil use his walker and throwing a stuffed chicken for lucy when ryan offered me a deal...i would shower with wil, he would shower with lucy. both desperately needed a bath.

in the middle of my shower with wil i heard ryan talking to someone and thought he was on the phone. he then opened the door and i could see someone down the stairs staring up at me...it was TIA. i was so excited. tia, shawn & hank made a surprise trip to NJ for the weekend. it was perfect! we had a wonderful weekend eating portuguese food, watching football, visiting the beach and laughing. (especially when while tia was giving wil a bath, hank felt the need to get in on the action.) it was just what the higgins family needed.

sadly we took only one picture (above) but we have good memories. thank you tia, shawn & hank for making the trip. it was fantastic!

*this was the weekend of the 11th. i had a busy week last week and am just getting around to posting this.

appetite pleasin'

oh ranch style beans...how i love you. let me count the ways:

1. oooey
2. gooey
3. spicy
4. thick
5. bean-y
6. delicious
7. stylish

about a month ago i used the last can of a case that lasted exactly one year. i was stingy with the beans but once used 2 cans (!!!) in a kooky casserole i made when i was preg. because they are not available in the stores here lindsey and i drove a case from texas to new jersey last summer. having a whole case to myself was fabulous and so much better than bringing back a can or two in my suitcase. yum. if you've never eaten ranch style beans it's very difficult to explain what all the fuss is about. they are unlike any bean i know and the best way to describe them is to borrow from the can which describes them as appetite pleasin'.

i was feeling so sad to have eaten the last of the beans that i photographed the last can before we ate them. luckily my aunt becky loves me very much and felt so sorry for me that she sent me not one, but TWO, cases of RSBs for my birthday!!! people, in case the math escapes you, that is 48 CANS! yeehaw!

thanks, beck, for the beans. what an unexpected and delightful gift. i promise not to use them all at once...and if i do, i promise to stand down-wind.

a perfect 10

wil turns 10 months old today. it seems hard to believe that he's now been "out" longer than he was "in". he is growing so fast and time seems to be moving at warp speed. i became a little emotional over it all this morning and ryan, ever the optimist, said to me, "just think of all the cool conversations you'll have with him as he gets older." ryan always knows what to say to make me feel better. and, honestly, he's right. if he didn't grow we'd never hug, laugh at the same joke, run in a three legged race together, make cookies, and on and on. but, gosh, does it have to go SO fast???

the 10 month old wil is chattier than ever, loves music and moves around like a whirling dervish. he sings along with songs (to the delight of our music class teacher) and, although he isn't clapping just yet, he loves to keep rhythm on his drum or anything flat. he is delighted by all animals, especially stone, and seems to have a genuine love of reading (although the days of sitting still for more than 1 or 2 books at a time are dwindling.) he laughs at us and at himself. he will break into spontaneous laughter after babbling to himself and we wish like mad that we were part of his inside joke. he is happy always (unless hungry or overtired) and i fill with pride each time someone acknowledges his joy. he is studious and thoughtful, mischievous and playful; characteristics that fondly remind me of us. he continues to chow down like a competition eater and the only food related trouble we face is getting food to him fast enough. he continues to love the water and we get him in the pool or the ocean as often as we can. he crawls on all fours, pulls up on EVERYTHING and takes fragile steps anywhere he can find something to hold onto.

he is physically growing like a weed. he wears size 18 mo. in most clothing and has an extra wide foot. his bottom two front teeth are completely in and make him even cuter than he was without them. in the past week, the top four middle teeth have broken through the gums and i cannot wait to see how that affects his million dollar smile. he is tall and getting taller by the day; strong and getting stronger by the day.

over the past few weeks i have seen changes in him and felt them in myself. i am both amazed and frustrated by an outstanding increase in energy but only because mine does not match it. i am in awe of his charm, his mind, his heart and see his personality evolving each second. he is amazing and no i longer plainly love him but have fallen in love with him as well. my heart is overflowing - as queer as that sounds - and i know now, even better than i did 10 months ago, that my life will never be the same.

happy 10 months, wil. you continue to delight and amaze us...we adore you.

just-in time

it seems like every time i am about to get homesick to see someone from home i get a visit. at the end of august i was beginning to feel bummed that i wouldn't see any family until november. after much consideration we called off a september texas trip due to insane airline prices and bad timing. about the same time we were deciding not to go to texas, my delightful (and cute!) cousin justin made arrangements to come up and visit. justin is one of the most relaxed guys i know and truly lives a "go with the flow" lifestyle. because he is so easy his visits are always freewheeling and fun. we did three states in 6 days and it was a blast. here are some of the highlights:

*thursday: train trip to NY, lunch at isabella's (best burger ever!), afternoon at the museum of natural history. i think we could've spent 2 days in this museum and still not seen everything. it was fantastic!


*friday: car trip to liberty state park, picnic on ellis island, visit to statue of liberty. if you've never visited ellis island it is truly a sight to behold. and old lady liberty isn't too shabby, either.


*weekend: labor day with shawn & tia in PA...guys watched football, i got my hair done, we went to a rib & clam bbq, shot off fireworks and lounged by the pool for two days. it was great!


justin and wil made great friends. it's not hard to imagine knowing how chill they both are. about 100 people over the course of our touristy activities thought wil was OUR child and that gave us some good (but a tad uncomfortable) chuckles. justin was a great sport to hit all the sights with his cousin and a baby who used him as a human jungle gym. i hope we didn't dampen his style too much. we were so sad to see justin go (ryan and i tried to convince him to be our manny) but we are already looking forward to the next visit. love you justin! thanks for coming... just in time.

for the picture version of this story...click here.

happy hair

after writing the longest post in history on hair (it made kyle's head spin) i have failed to update you on the haircut. i spent a wonderful, quite morning in a lovely salon and got to rest, chat with friends and read a magazine cover to cover completely unmolested. it was a great experience the best part of which was the outcome. i love my hair, it is perfect for me and exactly what i wanted. (i chickened out on cutting it off. it's just not for me....right now.)

thank you gwen for the best haircut i have had in a long time. i have yet to even blow it dry because, for once, i LOVE the way it looks when it dries naturally. i am so pleased that i will be a repeat customer for many years. thanks a million!

the new 'do.
(sorry for the repeat of this picture. it's the only shot i have of the hair.)

7 years....no itch

it was on a beautiful day seven years ago that ryan and i said "i do." from the very first time i spoke to ryan i knew he was someone special. i have never met anyone like him - before or since. he is a laid back, kind hearted, funny, loving guy who lives his motto, "it is what it is." there isn't much that gets him upset and there isn't anything that he doesn't face with an open mind and a peaceful heart. ryan is a guy that everyone wants to know and be friends with. he is the most wonderful person i know and i feel so grateful that he chose me all those years ago.

the past seven years have been nothing short of interesting. we have experienced many ups and downs but we never lost sight of our humor and have laughed (A LOT!) through a lot of tough times. i believe that we truly were made for each other and i couldn't imagine my life without him. he is the perfect husband, a wonderful father and my very best friend. we balance one another well and have since the very first hello. there is no one else that i'd rather go through life with than ryan. borrowing from jerry maguire...as queer as it sounds....he completes me.

so thanks ryan for seven wonderful years. i love you more than anything and i enjoy every day of this ride with you. thanks for keeping me laughing and for loving me so fiercely. you are one of a kind and i love you very, very, VERY much.

that was then....

this is now...

***thanks to rob & jess for keeping wil so we could celebrate. we love you guys!